The Legend of Cars x Bubbletea: A Legend Untold

I’m still getting a few questions on when meets are happening and/or where… I guess I never really explained it other than on my IG story feed, so if you missed that 24 hour window, I guess you still don’t really know unless it was by word of mouth LOL! Truth is, I don’t have the answer anymore and I don’t think I will for a loooong time. The purpose of this post is really just to remove any affiliation of my name/blog with the meets currently happening at the old spot. I see some people still reposting my art and using it as a reminder for the meets, but they are not mine.

I wanted to give a quick shout out to Bill (https://officialthreetwenty.com) for giving me a few of these decals – they pretty much summarize what our car meets turned into. You see, last year – we decided to start a Cars X Bubbletea meet for fun just to change it up a bit. Some of our older meets were dying out or not even happening anymore and we were itching to just get together and shoot the shit like good ol’ days. I guess that was our problem. You can never have the good without the bad

I think this is where I can start to tell the tale of the urban legend known as Cars x Bubbletea. Long, long ago – there was a group of clans that wanted to revive the remnants of car meets and they did so by gathering all the legendary cars from far and wide for one big meet to discuss the old-wives tales of neon underglow, NOS and other finer things. Individuals from the far reaches of Germany and their clans from VoLkSVAWgen and OWdEE to the corners of Japan and their clans from HAWNda and toYODA and everything in between were present. It had been millenia since these clans had met and for the first couple of gatherings – it was grand and simple, yet majestic in its own right. It was a meeting of the minds where brothers and sisters joined as one – everybody knew each other and respectfully passed each other with bows and skirtsys. Even local merchants participated in this meeting and t’was not a single fear on those nights. Life was good and there was not a worry in the world.

The gatherings continued happily until one fateful night… A small group of grotesque infidels caught wind of these gatherings and decided to see what these were about. Understanding that these meets consisted of the highest powers from around the world, they sent in small numbers of sleuths to gather intel. Initially, these heathens alarmed no one – the clans believed that greater numbers were good to stand against the threat known as Ricers. Little did they know that these heathens in small numbers were the enemy at hand – it wasn’t until it was too late that they realized it was yet another Trojan horse attack.

Ricers were known as an underground group of individuals that never really knew which path to follow. They were non-believers of quality and lived only to cause disruption of the good for their own pleasure. Although there have been many trials and cases of this clan, they have failed to reform. Many question their ability to understand the ways of social acceptance and belonging and some Doctors have even cited lower intellectual scores than average. They are often A-sexual and continue reproducing by clinging onto their birth parents to continue funding their evil. The fight against this clan is an ongoing battle that continues today – they evolve and change their appearance quickly, so they can be difficult to identify… The lower ranks consist of panels painted with mud from that of a pig pen and wheels made from steel stolen from refineries, while the higher ranks are better at blending in with second-hand quality parts and blacksmiths that turned rogue and work out of alleyways and side streets. Do not let them deceive you.

It is because of the Ricer clan that the Cars x Bubbletea meet fell to its knees. They attacked quickly and ferociously with their newly acquired tech found by pairing Rice Krispies cereal and low quality metal tubes to create what they call burble tunes. Others continue to burn their Nankang tires creating blinding smoke and piercing noise as a mating call to bring forth more of their kind. They are merciless and dangerous in large numbers and are often seen reacting to each other with raging erections and extreme salivation.

The higher clans were split and sent back to their corners of the world once again. What was once known as a peaceful estate turned into a feeding ground for the Ricers. In hindsight, although it was too late, there was nothing the clans could do to prevent the inevitable. Evil can seep through in many ways and this is one of them. Today, the clans seek new refuge and continue facing the challenges that the Ricers bring and although peace may not be on the horizon, the ongoing battle will continue.

Anyway, please don’t be a douche – I see stories every day of meets being ruined by you losers. I know you might be reading this and chuckling about it thinking it’s funny, but it really, really isn’t. I may have re-told this story in a very historic way, but I meant every offensive word of it.

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